I could blame my political ignorance on the fact that we have not had television since July of 2005; I could say I’m too busy to read up on current events on line, but they would all be a lie. I sit here at my computer trying to will myself to read The Houston Chronicle online, or The Eagle, maybe a quick look at MSN, but I can’t. Part of it is the fact that I am not familiar with the names splayed on the headlines, I feel a bit stupid for not knowing who Hugo Chavez is or why his name should mean something. I know however that I can be caught up within a week of surfing the news feeds, listening to some talk radio, or maybe even discussing issues with Marc. I know too that I’m way too proud to admit to anyone that I need help. It’s not that I don’t care about the world around me, maybe I care too much. This Sunday during our Bible study class we heard from a couple who had recently returned from a trip to San Salvador. This couple is working to get funds to build a decent orphanage in the area. They spoke of a five year old boy walking the streets on his own for a week. My heart ached at the thought of that poor baby without a mother, without a hand to hold and help him cross the street, without the privilege of not having to think of where is next meal may come from, or where he will go when it gets dark. What about the other five year old boys in the orphanage whose mothers dumped them to fend for themselves, the two year old girl waiting for arms to rock her to sleep, or better yet the 12 year old girl who will probably never be adopted and end up on the streets when the orphanage can no longer care for her? My 76 X 16 home would seem like heaven to them, my unconditional love and hugs could be a way of life they’ve never known.
It’s not that I don’t care about what is happening in the world, it’s that I feel too small to do anything; to do what I feel is right. Is it wrong for me to sometimes feel ignorance truly is bliss? I don’t know. The world I live in is broken. I cannot fix it for my children. I feel helpless. Sure I could join and support a myriad of groups whose causes mirror my own, but how much time is enough. Will my desire, and guilt, lead me to abandon my children’s needs to "save the world?" God has given me three wonderful boys, He has given me all I need to care for them; a loving family throughout my childhood, parents who taught me how to love, friends whose advice I can take to heart, a loving husband and father to my children, and most of all a soul that is willing to reach out and ask Him for help when I don’t think I can care for them on my own.
So, do I miss the newsflash of thousands of people dying or yet another sodomy victim, how about the most recent actor’s drug OD or the baby dumped in a trash can, do I worry about not being able to discuss world politics at the drop of a hat or recognize the names of those whose minds are so evil as to feel justified in their killing sprees, NO! I pray daily for those in charge of our nation and other nations; I pray for those teaching my children; I pray for my husband; I pray that my boys will grow to love God and seek Him in all they do; I pray for friends and family, I pray that I will be more willing to serve God; I do all that is in my power to do. God gave me the power to pray directly to Him, how awesome is that
Hey….
I’m glad I read this…I hope you don’t think I was trying to guilt you about not being more informed. It’s just my big obsession at the moment. I can totally relate to the whole “ignorance is bliss” thing…as I’ve said before…that was me (prior to 9-11). But…once the light bulb was on…I just couldn’t shut it off.
The big difference between you and I (in my humble opinion), is the whole faith issue. You have it… I don’t…it’s that simple. Therefore; praying for you, IS doing something…and that’s completely valid. For me it’s not so simple…my only weapon …my only defense..is knowledge, understanding…and hopefully, action. I try and provide the kids with as much un-biased information as I can get my hands on, which will hopefully aid them in making informed decisions of their own. I watch and read different news sources, I’ve gone to protests, done mailings, I even plan on spending some time helping with political campaigns here locally. Will that make a differece? I have no idea. Does it matter?… well, it does to me.
In the old days I felt like …”Hell, what difference does it make…I can’t change anything..so why bother”…I felt safe in my cloistered little suburb. I was happy..maybe even a little arrogant. Now it’s exactly the opposite, I am more meloncoly these days but, my knowledge of what is going on actually makes me feel more alive…more connected…more powerful… and more humble.
There is no right or wrong way to deal with this stuff. Caring about and for one’s own family…I think we can agree….. is ultimately the best thing that any of us can do that makes any concrete difference in the end.
BUT…and here is the clencher….
There was an expression I remember from my pseudo religious days… and it said something like..”Prayer without deeds is meaningless”…I thought that was very profound back then…and I still do.
Those “deeds” have to be defined by the person…whatever they turn out to be…but I think that if this issue struck that much of a chord with you…it was for a reason…..don’t be afraid to go out a limb Hoochita…sometimes leaving one’s comfort zone can be fun…
I can picture you out at a peace rally with Burkenstocks, and a tye die shirt!